HOW TO FIX A BROKEN RELATIONSHIP?
It’s natural for couples to have ups and downs in their marriage. But when the bad times start to outnumber the good, it may be time for you to focus on the real issues plaguing your marriage. Here are 12 tips on how to fix a broken marriage and get back to sharing a healthy relationship.
1. QUESTIONS TO ASK YOURSELF:
If you want to learn how to fix a broken relationship, there are certain questions you need to ask yourself. These will help you understand why you truly want to stay with your partner and whether it’s a good idea.
- (i). Do I Really Want to Learn How to Save a Broken Relationship? This is an important question to ask because it determines how you truly feel about your spouse. Are you willing to put in the effort to make your relationship healthy because you love your partner or because being in a relationship makes you feel comfortable?
- (ii). Does My Spouse Want to Stay in the Relationship? If there is unhappiness in the relationship, there’s probably a good reason why. Talk openly with your partner about how they feel about your partnership and if they truly want to fix things.
- (iii). Does My Spouse Treat Me Well? If you and your spouse used to have a happy, healthy marriage then it is worth trying to fix. But, if you often found yourself arguing or feeling bad about yourself around your spouse, strongly consider ending the relationship.
2. COMMUNICATE YOUR FEELINGS:
- Many therapists say that communication is the key to a happy marriage. You and your partner should be able to freely discuss any topic.
- Kindly bring up any problems that you are having in the relationship. Discuss your finances, your sex life, and other areas that need improvement in your marriage.
- Part of communicating is knowing when to speak and when to listen. If your partner is sharing their feelings with you, stay quiet and give them your undivided attention.
- Remember that communication is about more than just discussing problems and concerns. It’s about connecting on an emotional level. This is an important stepping stone toward fixing your broken relationship.
3. DON’T LIE TO EACH OTHER:
- The most important piece of marriage advice you can ever follow is to be honest with your spouse.
- It should really go without saying, but if you want to have a healthy relationship, you can’t make a habit of lying. One lie can spiral into dozens. This can be detrimental to a marriage.
- Be honest with your spouse, even when things are hard to talk about. If you have trouble verbalizing your feelings, share them with your partner through a letter and sit with them as they read it.
4. PRACTICE HEALTHY CONFLICT RESOLUTION TIPS:
Part of fixing your relationship involves rethinking how you speak to one another. The next time you are having an argument, consider these tips:
- Don’t use foul language
- Be respectful to each other
- Listen when your partner is speaking
- Don’t interrupt them
- Be clear and concise about your issues
- Don’t resort to name-calling or physical violence/aggression
- Have empathy for your spouse
- Strive to see their side of the argument
- Speak with the intention of solving the problem
5. BE ACCOUNTABLE TO ONE ANOTHER:
One of the best pieces of relationship advice for restoring a broken marriage is to be accountable to one another. This is essential for marriages where infidelity has occurred. You can be accountable to your spouse by doing the following:
- Calling when you say you will
- Texting back in a timely manner
- Checking in throughout the day
- Making decisions together
- Explaining why you will be late
- Talking openly about your finances
- Inviting your spouse to go with you to social events
- Communicating when there is an issue in the marriage
- Allowing your partner access to your electronic devices/giving out passwords
- Choosing honesty
6. LOOK FOR WAYS TO BE KIND:
- Studies show that couples were the happiest when expressing appreciation and kindness to one another were regular staples in their relationship.
- You and your spouse should look for ways to be kind to one another. Some ways you can do this are by making your partner’s coffee or tea in the morning, filling up the car with gas, or telling them how attractive you find them.
7. EMBRACE CHANGES:
- As you and your partner grow, mature and change, so will your marriage. Instead of worrying about what is going to happen, learn to embrace these changes.
- If your partner takes up a new hobby or wants to pursue a new job or move away, show your support.
- By supporting your partner and striving to be a part of the change, you’ll ensure that you and your spouse are growing together instead of apart.
8. BE FORGIVING:
- If you’ve been together for a long time, you’re bound to get on each other’s nerves every now and then. The key to how to fix a broken marriage has a lot to do with forgiving one another.
- Forgiveness takes strength, especially if your partner has hurt or betrayed you in the past. By being transparent and accountable to one another, you can rebuild that trust and learn to forgive them.
- When you feel you can put the past behind you, agree to forgive and forget. Move forward with your lives, giving each other as much of a clean slate as you can muster. By doing this, you’ll be able to start fresh in your marriage.
9. DON’T GIVE UP:
- Here’s the bottom line when it comes to relationship advice: be patient and don’t give up. Relationships take time and effort to repair, especially if trust has been broken.
- Both spouses need to put the relationship first in their lives – above work, their social life, and anything else that may come up. By giving your marriage your full attention, you’ll be able to focus on strengthening your physical and emotional connection.
- Be patient. Relationships can’t change overnight. If both spouses put each other first, they will see positive results.
10. SEEK THERAPY:
- If you really want to learn how to fix a broken marriage, it may be in your best interest to see a relationship counselor.
- Since your counselor is an outsider to your relationship, they’ll be able to provide a level ground. Your sessions will be a neutral place to talk about both sides of your issues and get unbiased relationship advice on how to fix what isn’t working.
- At these sessions, you will learn to communicate with one another. Your counselor will give you different techniques that will help you to speak your mind clearly and without triggering anger in your partner. You’ll be taught how to bring up issues without making your partner defensive.
- Your therapist will be able to identify troubled areas of your relationship and teach you how to resolve conflict.
- Besides identifying and correcting bad communication behaviors, your sessions will also help you build trust with one another. They will also help you make a life plan for dealing with any issues that may come up in the future.
11. SCHEDULE AND STICK TO A REGULAR DATE NIGHT:
- Choose one night of the week and designate it as your date night.
- Do something fun or romantic together that will help you reconnect on an emotional and physical level. This could mean staying at home with a bottle of wine, going to a museum, or getting a babysitter and reconnecting over a fancy, romantic dinner.
- Date night is a great way to restore romance in your relationship and strengthen your marital friendship – but you have to stick to it!
12. LEAVE THE PAST IN THE PAST:
- One way you can learn how to fix a broken marriage is by leaving the past in the past.
- If there is a problem in your relationship, it’s important to discuss it and work through it. But once you have reached a resolution, try and leave the incident behind you.
- Dredging up your partner’s past mistakes can make it impossible to move on. It can also make you feel resentful of your partner and your relationship.
The best relationship advice for how to fix a broken marriage is to communicate openly with your partner. Work hard to rebuild any trust that has been broken. Practice healthy conflict resolution strategies and strive to laugh more as a couple. And above all else: don’t give up on your marriage.